Children and Young People FAQs
Checking texts, monitoring your movements and telling you what to do are signs of jealous, controlling and abusive behaviour. This behaviour can become worse over time and leave you isolated from your friends and unhappy. Relationships should be equal and supportive and you should feel comfortable to see who you want to and go where you choose. If you can’t talk to your boyfriend about his behaviour, think about ending the relationship. If you want more advice you can always phone us on 03000 110 110.
Every case is different and depends on your child’s age, experiences and relationship with their dad. However, most children are relieved to be out of a house where abuse and violence are taking place although they may still love and want to see the abusive parent.
Getting help and support if you are being abused means that you are taking active steps to protect and care for both yourself and your children. Social services would see this as a positive. However, we could only offer advice on this if we know more about your individual circumstances. Please ring our helpline which is free and confidential.
Many children who’ve witnessed or experienced domestic abuse will usually be confused, frustrated and worried about what is happening. One form of expressing this is through anger. Some children may also copy behaviours that they have seen in the home and if they have seen or heard angry behaviour they could copy this.
IDAS can work with you and your children to help reduce their anger and aggressive behaviour.
There is help available for children and young people but this varies from area to area. We provide an advocacy service to children in York and the Respect Young Person’s Programme across North Yorkshire. In Barnsley we offer a Young Person’s Domestic Violence Advisor who supports anyone over the age of 13. We can also refer children on to a range of agencies for counselling and play therapy.
For more information about any of our services please email [email protected]
Domestic abuse can affect your children in many different ways even if they are not directly hit or verbally abused. Many children hear or witness the abuse and this can leave them traumatised.
Common effects include:
- Anxiety and depression
- Disturbed sleeping patterns, including nightmares and flashbacks
- Physical symptoms such as stomach aches
- Bed wetting
- Temper tantrums
- Regressing into much younger than they are
- Displaying aggressive behaviour or alternatively withdrawing from people and relationships
- Low self-confidence or self-worth
Older children may also have problems with school or begin to engage in risk taking behaviours such as misusing substances, or self-harming.
If you have a question please contact us on [email protected]